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NEWS BLOOPER - WNBC-TV


MONDAY COUNTDOWN - TOP 5 SONGS WITH A CITY IN THE TITLE

CATFISH LIST
1-Woman From Tokyo - Deep Purple
2-La Grange - ZZ TOP
3-Detroit Rock City - KISS
4-Cleveland Rocks - Presidents Of the United States of America
5-London Calling - The Clash

Honorable Mention:
Gary, Indiana - Robert Preston
Viva Las Vegas - Elvis
Come See St. Joe Today! (The St. Joe Puppets)
Sweet Home Chicago - The Blues Brothers
L.A. Woman - the Doors
Philadelphia Freedom - Elton John
Will Smith - Miami

JASON LEE LIST
1-Detroit Rock City - KISS
2-No Sleep til Brooklyn - Beastie Boys
3-Werewolves In London - Warren Zevon
4-Santa Monica - Everclear
5-Straight Outta Compton - N.W.A.

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MUSIC AND MOVIES WE THOUGHT WERE GREAT
...BUT REALLY SUCK.
Adventures of Ford Fairlane
Roger Rabbit
Short – Circuit
Heavy Metal
Night at the Roxbury
Eddie Murphy – RAW
Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure
Wayne’s World
Purple Rain

Hootie and the Blowfish
Dave Matthews Band
Motley Crue
Poison
Good Charlotte

IF YOU WERE A PROSTITUTE, HOW MUCH WOULD YOU BE WORTH? FIND OUT.

Cinco De Mayo - TOP 5 Hottest Latinas!
Catfish List
1- Shakira
2- Salma Hayek
3- Eva Longoria
4- Daisy Fuentes
5- Jessica Alba

Jason’s List
5 - Jessica Alba
4 - Paz Vega
3 - Eva Menendez
2 - Shakira
1- Christina Agulera

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As Mayors of Southwest Michigan……..

We would combine all Citiies/Towns & Villages into one BIG CITY:
We will rename it….” U R Here”, Michigan
From Exit 1 to Exit 41 and all points East to the Berrien County Line.
All exisiting cities, towns and villages will become NEIGHBORHOODS….
All Police Departments will be combined to create a MASSIVE BUDGET and ALL CARS WILL BE THE SAME…
Metal Music Only will be played in vehicles at excessive levels, all other’s will fined……
Street Parking will be allowed on most streets in ALL NEIGHBORHOODS 24 hours a day / 7 days a week
An Open Air HOOTERS will be erected on Silver Beach….
Sidewalks will be built from Napier Avenue at 1-94 to Berrien Hills Golf Club
All FIPS & HOOSIERS entering our state will be required to pay US A TOLL, this is payback for all the TOLLS we have paid them over the years….

Monday, April 28, 2008 - TOP 5 Movie STONERS
Catfish List

1- Spicoli – Sean Penn – Fast Times

2- Cheech & Chong – Up In Smoke

3- Robert Downey JR. – Less than Zero

4-John Bender – Judd Nelson – Breakfast Club

5-Pauly Shore – Son in Law

 

 

Jason’s List

5- Cheech Marin – Up In Smoke

4- Chris Tucker - Friday

3- Jay from Jay & Silent Bob

2- Brad Pitt – True Romance

1- Spicoli – Fast Times at Ridgemont High!!

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SING! ... or is that something else?

MONDAY COUNTDOWN FOR APRIL 21, 2008
TOP 5 BREAKFAST CEREALS

Catfish's List!
1-Fruity Pebbles
2-LIFE
3-TRIX
4-Froot Loops
5-Captain Crunch's Crunch Berries

Jason's List!
5 - Lucky Charms
4- Cap'n Crunch
3 - Cinnamon Toast Crunch
2 - Cocoa Pebbles
1 - Cinnamon LIFE

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GI Nate is about to get hit by a Dust Storm...

MONDAY COUNTDOWN FOR APRIL 14, 2008
TOP 5 BLACK SITCOMS

Catfish

#1 - Good Times

#2 - What's Happening

#3 - The Jefferson's - greatest theme song ever

#4 - Sanford and Son - 2nd greatest theme song ever

#5 - Different Strokes

 

Jason Lee

#1 - Sanford and Son

#2 - Fresh Prince

#3 - Bernie Mac

#4 - Living color

#5 - Everybody Hates Chris

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MONDAY COUNTDOWN FOR APRIL 7, 2008
TOP 5 OVERRATED MOVIES

Catfish

1- Star Wars - the year 2000 sequels

2- Rocky - Why Bother?

3- Gone with the Wind - REALLY?

4- Blair Witch Project - boring

5- Chicago - All Hype - movie of costumes.....

 

Jason Lee

1- Forrest Gump

2- Matrix

3- Easy Rider

4- Rocky Movies

5- Blair Witch Project/Gone With The Wind

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SEE HOW HOT SABRINA IS ON CAMERA FROM THE INTERVIEW
ABOUT "I JUMP, YOU JUMP."
ON THE "YOU GOTTA SEE THIS" PAGE!

HERE SHE IS AGAIN!


March 31, 2008 MONDAY COUNTDOWN:
TOP 5 DEVIL SONGS 

Catfish List

5.) Kid Rock - Devil Without a Cause
4.) Rolling Stones - Sympathy for the Devil
3.) Van Halen - Runnin' with the Devil
2.) Motley Crue - Shout at the Devil
1.) INXS - The Devil Inside

Jason Lee List

5.) Van Halen: Runnin' with the Devil
4.) The Cult - Lil Devil
3.) Charlie Daniels - Devil Went Down to Georgia
2.) Metallica - Devil's Dance
1.) Iron Maiden - Number of the Beast

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The Catfish Roommates Katie and Traci ... Mmmmm Bananas!



WHICH SHIRT IS GAYER? Take the Poll NOW on the left hand side of the page...

Top 5 Greatest Yo Mama So Fat Jokes….

Catfish List

5) Yo mamma so fat when she puts on her BVD’s they stretch and spell boulevard
4) Yo momma so fat she works in a glass shop, sitting on sand
3) Yo Mamma so fat, she got baptized with Shamu at Sea World
2) Yo mamma so fat I took a picture of her last christmas and its still printing
1)Yo mama so fat she went to the movies and sat next to EVERYBODY!

Jason Lee List…..

5) Yo Momma SO FAT….She got a run in her Blue Jeans
4) Yo mama so fat She Deep Frys her toothpaste
3) Yo mama so fat Asks for the bucket on the KFC Sign
2 Yo mama so fat When she was born she gave the hospital STRETCH MARKS
1) Yo mama so fat When your momma’s at a Concert….The Band Skips

Honorable Mention:

Yo mama so fat…After Sex , She Smokes A Turkey
Yo mama so fat when she plays hopscotch, she goes New York, L.A., Chicago...
Yo mama So Fat……when you get on top, your ears pop
Yo Mama So Fat….She’s got more chins than a Hong Kong Phone Book!!
Yo mama so Fat…..She Sweats When she BLINKS!!!
Yo mama so Fat……Her Belt size is EQUATOR
Yo Mama’s so Fat….Kids Chasin behind her yell….Hey Kool-Aid Man
Yo Mama’s so Fat…..The Kiddie Pool growin up was her Sweat Puddles
Yo Mama’s so Fat….When she goes swimming, whales start singing , “We are family”

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Impossible Human Things to Do ... (apparently this one is called "violate a chair")

Jimmy Ruff could actually touch his NOSE with his tounge. Ladies, email Jason Lee for his phone number.

www.alifeforsale.com to sell your life!

American Family Insurance Commercial:

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CAT-FISH.

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CATFISH NEEDS SOME $&@%ING WATER AT HIS APARTMENT!
WILL YOU LET HIM TAKE A SHOWER AT YOUR PLACE?




Thanks to Jerry and Jenny from Benton Twp. Call Jerry to PLOW your...DRIVEWAY. 208-9175.

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What the HELL is Annette wearing?	PETER COFFIN from PETERCOFFIN.COM

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Think the "Rock Band" video game rules? Waste some time with THIS!

Alright, here  they are.  We were bombarded with e-mails after we tried the Cucumber Pepsi (terrible).  We narrowed it down to the Best, the Worst, the overused Cliche' Recipe, and a Booze Recipe.

Bun, Turkey Burger, Mozzarella Cheese, Bacon, Hamburger,  Cheddar Cheese sauce, Mushrooms, Chicken, Lettuce, Tomato, Bun.

Sliced Bananas and Mayo on Toast.  We tried it on untoasted bread and it was the worst thing ever.  We filed it under "almost good" after we put it on toast.

Pickles and Vanilla Ice Cream.  You can not polish this dish not matter how hard you try.  A burnt hair and turd sandwich would have went down better.

12 Miller Lites, 1 Bottle Citrus Vodka, and 3 cans Frozed Lemonade from concentrate.  This was about as bad as it looks, but it will get you really drunk.

Hands down, our favorite Retro-Hottie.  What guy wasn't in love with Winnie Cooper from the Wonder Years.  Well, we found these and had to pass them along.

But wait, there's more!  Who loves ya', bitches!

Quick note: Just do us a favor and help us avoid any hassle from your Mommy and Daddy, if your under 18 years of age, get off the computer and go do your homework.  Some of these sites aren't suitable for you.

Oh hell, while we're at it, check out some of these cool videos that only take a couple of minutes.  Fine, this is just another excuse to waste some time.

Whoa, Hot for Teacher.  Bet you can't do this.

Here's another kid making the rest of us feel like losers.

This is the funniest 5 seconds EVER!

Check out the Nipple on this chics foot!

Oh man, check out the guy with the dick on his arm!!

The first official meeting of the "Guys of the Round Table" was a huge success.  Sure, there was lots of booze, cigars, cigarettes, and porno, but we did get alot of work done.  Let this be the beginning of the Man Book:

Man Law:  When you knock a man out of a Texas Hold Em' Tournament, you must buy that man a beer.

Man Law:  No man shall use the word "poop" or "pee," unless his children are in the area.  There are planty of acceptable alternatives, including, "drop the duece" or "dropping the Browns off at the Super Bowl."

Man Law:  No man shall piss in the toilet if he's naked and about to hit the shower.  The shower is a perfectly fine place for your business, whatever that may be.  And remember, whatever happens in the shower, hopefully goes down the drain.

Man Law:  No man shall date a buddies ex-wife, even if he gives you the green light.  Come on, your buddies junk has been there and that's f*ckin' gay.  Ex-Girlfriends?  That's a differnet story.  It is acceptable, but only if:

Man Law:  A man is allowed to attend a game of His teams rival.  For instance, if you are a Cub Fan, you may attend a St. Louis Cardinal/San Diego Padre game ONLY if you were a Cubs Jersey and Hat.  You must also repeatedly say, "I'm only here for the beer and dogs."

Man Law:  Every man MUST show his sex tapes to his buddies , but ONLY IF the girl is NOT wife material.

Man Law:  No Singing in front of other men!  However, if it's the 7th inning at Wrigley, it is not only permittable, it is required.

Man Law:  No man shall ever open a beer with his shirt.

Man Law:  No man shall ever leave half a beer.

Man LAw:  Any man with elective Cosmetic Surgery is out of the club.  This includes Burt Rynolds. 

              -Please let the record show that Jason Lee called BULLSHIT on this Man Law.  Being the Bandit TRUMPS everything.  Jason was outvoted 5 to 1 and the Bandit was launched.  We'll will be revoting this at the next meeting.

Got a Man Law you think need to be in the Book? Email Jason Lee above!

Gifford with our Guy in a Monkey Suit, as Rock 107 crashes the fancy News / Talk Station's remote.

Who's the a**hole listener who did this?

Jason Lee Show Supa-Fan Lunatic Larry, that's who.  Leave it to Lunatic Larry to have the nuts to slap a Rock 107 Bumper Sticker on Dale Earnhardt Jr.'s car.  We have nothing to say about this except, "We're sure there's a spot in Hillbilly Hell open for you."

I'm too old to say that a Rock Band Rules, but goddamn, these guys Rule.  Do yourself a favor and watch this.

Make Jonny Greaser Sick

After a rough couple of days at Cedar Point (including Jason puking from the Big Coaters), Jonny mocked, Jonny laughed, Jonny forgot his place on the Totem Pole (yea, it's the bottom), Jonny paid.  Oh yea, Jonny also bet us that he could chug an entire bottle of Syrup (ala Super Troopers), give him credit, he was pretty damn close.

Jonny guzzeled this much without stopping..	This is the end result of "Make Jonny Greaser Sick."  We beat that mouthy bastard.	Just for the record, this is Potted Meat.  What's in it?  Mechanically Seperated Chicken and Beef Tripe.  Mmmm...

We've noticed time and time again the lack of respect for our fellow man in public places of relief.  Sure, about 80% of us know the routine: get in, get out, get on with our lives.  Some folks, however, just don't get it.  Hence, an entire morning spent of the Restroom Rule Book.

-No Talking.  There is no awkward slience in the Mens Room, it's appropriate silence.  There's nothing worse than listening to some guy's story with your dick in your hand.

-Courtesy Flush.  Please, there is no such thing as excessive use of this feature.

-No Meat Gazing.  Keep your peepers on your side, I'll keep mine on mine.  If you have to know, just ask.

-No Shaking Hands.  If we're going to touch hands, we might as well swordfight because all the same germs are present.

-No Eye Contact.  Just like Prison, keep your eyes on the floor and no one freaks out.

-No Contact Period.  Let's just blanket staement this once and for all, No Hugging, No Chest Bumping, and for Christs sake, No High Fiving.

-No Loitering.  Don't hang around waiting, it's too much pressure for the guy that's trying to get in, get out, and get on with his life.  Don't tap your foot, don't whistle, don't do anything that will distract us from the task at hand.

-Scoot down.  If there is an open toilet down the row, Use It.  There is no reason for you to saddle up right next to us.  Much like the "I'm not a Homo seat at the Movie Theatre," please exercise the "I'm not a Homo urinal."

-Please use the Towels to Dry Your Hands.  The hand dryer is for the retarded.  It slows down progress and we just end up waiting like Jets on a runway at O'Hare.

-Be Quiet.  Hey, old guy, shut up.  Nothing could merit the sounds coming out of your mouth while reliving yourself.

-This is not Kinder-pisser.  Please teach your kid to piss at Home.  We don't need to hear your Nick Jr.  pissing instructions while you're in the stall.

-Flush.  Believe it or not, we have to put this on the list.

-No Sinking.  I don't care how long the line is at the Billy Ray show, Do Not Piss In the Sink.  We educated folk like to wash our hands in there.

-No Excessive Shaking.  More than five is considered jerking it, in the Mens Room, that's f*cking gay.

-Hands Down.  Hey, David Blaine, this isn't a magic show.  I don't care for the one hand trick, or worse, the no hander.

-No Beer.  Please do not bring your beer into the pisser, it's annoying watching you try to find a good place to set it.  And for the last time, NO, it won't balance on the plumbing of the urinal.

-Tip the Guy.  Do tip the attendant, he's got the worst job in the world.